On Episode 124 of the podcast this week, we’re tackling the concept of the mid-career crisis that we all experience at some point or another no matter what it is that we do during the week that constitutes a job, career, and so on and so forth (which means that, stay-at-home moms, this definitely includes you too!)… because here’s the thing:
No matter what job or responsibility tends to fill up our days, there comes a point in life when we run the risk of feeling the most burn-out, or unfulfillment, from that responsibility.
For some of us, this translates into feelings that we don’t have any time for ourselves, to do the things that we really want to do the most, while for others, this could mean that we’re itching to change our situation in such a way that the discomfort that comes from such a mid-career crisis is no longer present, no longer valid.
We discuss this more in depth on the episode this week, but I think that it’s an important conversation to tackle even further, because often when we run into a rut like this, we find ourselves in full-on panic mode… What do we do to help ourselves out of such a crisis?
For me, one of the big keys on tackling feelings of discomfort, especially those that come from the kind of crisis we’re exploring on the podcast, is to find ways to boost our happiness, both at home and at work.
You may remember back on Episode 119 (and in a previous post) the term I like to use to describe my approach to happiness: Wholistic Productivity. It’s all about making lifestyle changes that allows us to take care of ourselves as a whole—our whole selves.
Wholistic living — and wholistic productivity by extension — is about taking the steps to overcome the misconception that many of us (including me!) has had as it relates to our happiness, that by working longer and harder hours for monetary gain we’ll have all the tools we need to cultivate real joy, so that we can learn to take care of ourselves completely instead.
So, that being said, I want you to keep the idea of wholistic productivity in mind as I share just three of the ways that have helped me to overcome my own mid-career crisis…
And remember, finding and maintaining happiness in all areas of life is not at all about trying to “balance” your time between the existing divisions… because balance is bogus! Rather, it’s about finding harmony between the different areas of our lives instead.
I am sure you’ve heard the old adage that you can’t pour from an empty cup, and this certainly rings true both at home and at work.
If we don’t start treating ourselves, our goals, and other aspirations as a priority that requires some of our focused time and energy, then we certainly can’t devote ourselves anywhere else quite as completely or effectively as we might imagine. The fact is: If you’re unhappy at home, then chances are you’ll be unhappy at work—and vice versa.
So, the first secret to finding and maintaining happiness in the different divisions of your life is to make yourself a priority… No matter what!
Stop putting yourself at the bottom of your people-pleasing list and begin treating yourself like you are a priority… because you are! You’re important, and you need to function and be happy if you’re going to be able to fulfill the needs of all those people around you at home and at the office.
Reframe your thinking so that you know and understand that you need to take care of yourself so that you can then take care of everyone else. And remember, self-care isn’t selfish… it’s the exact opposite.
This is a big one, and it’s totally right up there with our conversation on wholistic productivity!
We’ve talked about it a few times before, but it bears repeating… because for so many of us, we think that if we don’t say yes to every single request, then we’re failing someone else out there who needs us. Or worse, we think that we’re running the risk of missing out on some big opportunity.
Instead letting FOMO – or, the fear of missing out – run our lives day in and day out, it’s important that we allow ourselves to say “no” to the invitations, tasks, and other things that life brings us from time to time so that we can start saying “yes” to what fulfills us the most.
When you’re presented with an opportunity, a favor, and so on… Ask yourself, how does this align with my goals, my purpose? How is this going to benefit me and allow me to cultivate the happiness that I need to rise above?
If an opportunity isn’t going to present you with the fulfillment that you need, then just say no. It may be a bit scary at first – especially if you’re a recovering people-pleaser! – but I assure you, saying no to something that doesn’t align with your purpose, whether it’s at home or at work, ultimately frees you up to say yes to something else that does.
This is a simple trick that works well with your schedule at home and at work, and it’s something that I implement in my own planning regime each and every day.
We talked about cushioning our time by building buffers into our life back on Episode 018, but I want to mention it again here because, let me tell you, it works and it is one of the ways that I have been able to cultivate happiness in all facets of my life.
We touch on this a little bit on the episode this week too, but for a simple recap here, think of adding cushions in your schedule like this:
Buffering our time is a way for us to bank up more time for ourselves. It’s a great way to maintain harmony at home and at work, and it’s a trick that we can use to find some breathing room in our days… no matter what we have on our plate!
And there you have it, just three simple things that I do to find happiness at home and at work! If you have any tips and tricks of your own that have helped you to cultivate happiness in all areas of your life, share them in the comments below…
Also, be sure to check out Episode 124 this week as we navigate the mid-career crisis: how we can overcome it, and what we mean when we say that we need to start filling up our calendars with substance that will keep us moving toward our goals and other big dreams!