Pursuing Your Passion Without the Mom Guilt

This week on Episode 133 of Productivity Paradox, I have the absolute pleasure of sitting down for a long chat with self-described “multi-passionate entrepreneur”, Lindsay Teague Moreno, to talk all about the importance of pushing beyond our comfort zone to go after the things that we are truly the most passionate about in life—no matter what!

Now for those of you who aren’t familiar with Lindsay, let me recap here just a bit: in addition to climbing her way up the career ladder in the business world, Lindsay is also a fellow writer (she’s written two books, Getting Noticed and her upcoming book, Boss Up!), podcaster, retail shop owner… and a mom, just like me and so many of you!

While we touch on a lot that goes into what it truly means to step out of our comfort zone when I comes to the pursuit of our big dreams on the episode, Lindsay and I also touch on some of the ways that we moms can break away from the guilt that we often experience when we’re simply craving more out of life for ourselves, as individuals, than what the traditional station of being a mother in our world today often lends.

And for me, this is an important conversation to have! Because while we have touched on the idea of “Mom Guilt” before in previous posts, it is one of the biggest topics that I often get asked about…

How can we stop falling into the Mom Guilt trap – especially when it means that, by doing so, we’re able to finally put both feet on the ground and chase after all of those dreams that we have time and time again put off for “someday”?

So that’s what I would like to touch on a bit more here today: How we can pursue our passion (or passions, if you’re in the same boat as Lindsay!) WITHOUT the Mom Guilt…

Because, guess what! There’s more to us as individuals that stretches well beyond Motherhood…

And if you’re someone that ever imagines themselves reaching for a bit more for yourself -outside of your family circle, then it’s high time that we all learn how to recognize (and celebrate!) the fact that we are all unique, capable individuals from the get-go.

 

Ready to jump in?

 

3 Ways to Break Away from the Mom Guilt Trap

 

1. Face Your Feelings Head-On – 

Moms, dads, women and men alike (parents or not!) all experience feelings that make us want to take a step back and retreat from time to time…

But here’s the thing: all of that discomfort doesn’t just go away. More likely than not, any unsettling feelings we experience and do not allow ourselves to acknowledge simply get stuffed way, way down inside of us… only to come bubbling up again when a bout of overwhelm sets in.

When it comes to feelings of discomfort – and Mom Guilt in particular! – it’s imperative that we allow ourselves the grace to first acknowledge that those feelings exist, and then to give ourselves the time we need to fully process them.

Where is your Mom Guilt coming from? What inspires it most often? Is there someone else who may be at the root of your MG? Write your answers to these questions and any others that you might have down on paper.

The next time you’re feeling a little guilty about something, whether it’s because you’re thinking about stepping beyond your role as a mom or you’re looking to change up your existing work-life flow so that you can focus on pursuing a job that you’ve been dreaming of, for example, allow those guilty feelings the attention that they deserve…

And then give yourself the permission you need to move beyond them!

 

2. Reframe Your Thinking – 

In my experience, one of the biggest obstacles that we moms face when we’re considering making a change that might take us beyond the scope of motherhood (especially when we occupy the role of a stay-at-home mom) is ourselves

We get so caught up in our day to day routines as mothers – caring for our kids, making sure that the house is clean, and being there for our partners – that we allow our own needs, dreams and desires sit on the back burner for “someday” when family life starts to calm down.

But guess what: Your family life will always be there! And there will always be an excuse lurking in the depths somewhere that will try to convince you that pursuing your own individual interests is just not in the cards for you.

And this, my friends, is exactly how Mom Guilt works!

So how do we get around it? Simple… When it comes to combating bouts of Mom Guilt, it’s important that we flip the script on the way that we think about ourselves moving beyond the scope of our station as moms.

Instead of looking at your own personal interests, passions, and big dreams as if they’re a threat to yourself as a mom and to your kids by extension… Think of pursuing your passions as a necessary step toward your journey of self-fulfillment and your ability to be a great role model for your children.

After all, kids need guidance (a lot of guidance!) all throughout their childhood and adolescent years, right? They need to learn all of the important lessons that will shape them into capable, hard-working, self-sufficient, happy adults…

And who better to teach your kids some of those lessons to them than YOU, their driven, self-sufficient, passionate, happy mom?

When in doubt, tell the Mom Guilt to move on out… and start looking at the pursuit of your passions – that is, your journey toward the fulfillment and happiness that you desire, as one of the stepping stones that will allow you to be the best role model that you can possibly be to your kids.

See what happens!

 

3. Focus on One Passion at a Time –

If you’re just beginning your journey toward self-fulfillment, then it might be helpful to focus on just one thing that you’re passionate about at the start, that you could easily transform into a goal for yourself. (Remember our conversation about SMART goals earlier on the podcast? Refer back for a crash course on how to set them for yourself!)

What is the one thing that you’ve been dreaming of pursuing but that has constantly fallen to the wayside? What’s that One Thing that you dream about that gets you the most amped up when you consider chasing after it? Focus on that!

We’ve talked about taking a big dream and turning it into an actionable goal that we can then, in turn, break up into small, bite-sized pieces… And it’s important to note here that we can do the exact same thing when we take that first step toward the pursuit of the thing (or things) we are most passionate about.

How can you turn that passion into a goal for yourself? Brainstorm some ideas on paper and then get to work!

The clearer you are about what your passion-driven journey might look like, the easier it will be for you to banish Mom Guilt for good… and just start.

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What is the one thing that you’re most passionate about? And if you haven’t started on your own journey toward self-fulfillment yet, then I want to know: What’s been holding you back? Share your experiences in the comments below…

And be sure to tune in to Episode 133 this week to catch everything that Lindsay Teague Moreno had to say about her own passion-driven journey, and to learn some of the tips and tricks that helped her banish her Mom Guilt for good along the way!

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Tonya Dalton
Tonya Dalton